Teta’s – Roseville

Lo and behold one of the greatest local discovery’s that we’ve ever made….yes, ever.

A seemingly unsuspecting establishment nestled on the ever-bustling main road in Roseville, Teta’s Lebanese Restaurant is one of those not-so-hidden gem that you always drive past…but never think to go into.

Thanks to the babes at Lick Your Phone, we had the pleasure of sampling some of the menu run by a Lebanese Armenian family (this alone should tell you exactly what you need to know about the food)! Everything is bursting with flavour, fresh, tasty, vibrant, colourful and diverse. The best part is…I really, genuinely and kind of surprisingly cannot think of even the tiniest thing I would change about their food. Being of a Middle-Eastern background myself, it takes a lot to impress me with ethnic food. You should know that my mum’s charcoaled kebabs  (without a doubt) would single-handedly achieve world peace.

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Now that I’ve talked this food up so much, it’s probably an appropriate time for me to profusely apologise about the severe lack of photos that will accompany this blog post. I could blame it on the lack-of-lunch induced state of starvation that I was in, but the reality is that this kind of food is meant to be shared with love. Enjoyed with friends. It’s messy, it’s hands-on, it brings people together and that’s the best bit about it. As soon as it was put down in front of me, I started eating without thinking. There was absolutely no sign of my inner food photographer and about 15 minutes later (after I had inhaled 2 baskets of the fried Lebanese bread #CarbsAreMaLyf), I realised what had just happened but it was too late. The plates looked like this….

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An absolute stand out of the whole night was the Fattoush salad (which you can vaguely see in the bottom of the above photo). If you’ve never enjoyed one of these taste sensations before, it consists of a traditional Lebanese garden salad with fried bread pieces and is dressed with sumac, lemon juice, pomegranate molasses and olive oil.  I have eaten many of these bad boys in my life but goodness me I could have eaten a bathtub of this one! While it’s a little bit of an acquired taste (as not everyone at the table frothed for it as much as I did), put pomegranate molasses on cardboard and I will eat it – that’s how much I love the stuff. It’s sweet, it’s tangy, it’s sour and it’s finger-licking good. I am currently salivating whilst writing this.

My second favourite dish was the Kataifi Prawns (no photo was taken before I ate the whole share plate – sorry not sorry?). They were giant, juicy prawns wrapped in crispy kataifi pastry sitting on top of the most delicious dollop of harrissa mayonnaise you’ve ever tasted. An absolute MUST-ORDER if and when you go!

Honourable mention must also go to the lemon garlic chicken – mainly because of the insanely tender meat and garlic so pungent my colleagues wouldn’t stand within a metre of me the next day. This was seriously yum, there’s just no other way to describe it. And the best part was that we were sent home with takeaways of this …YASSS!!

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 This picture might confuse you a bit, but don’t worry…when I sat down, I was confused too. There were metal poles fastened along the table every few seats down – someone made the comment that they thought it was a photography tool designed to make aerial flat-lay shots easier (haha wott?!). But no. It was WAY BETTER. THESE WOULD BE USED TO SUSPEND ONE METRE MEAT SKEWERS ALL ALONG THE TABLE! Yes, you read that correctly. MEAT BY THE METRE! What happened from here on and what it tasted like is all a bit of a blur…the food coma struggle was way too real. All I remember was the meat being cooked absolutely flawlessly & the marination was the stuff carnivorous dreams are made of.

What I will highly recommend though (even if you’ve eaten enough for three days) is the Nutella Aish Al Sarayah dessert. I’ve never tried something like this before and I was pleasantly surprised. A traditional Lebanese bread pudding with a modern twist, it was topped with clotted cream, fresh pistachios & Nutella. A really beautiful and unexpectedly light dessert.

All in all, I cannot recommend this place highly enough. Whether you’re a local or want to go on a Middle-Eastern food adventure where the food is hearty, made with love and a lot of pride…visit Teta’s. You won’t regret it & your belly will be forever grateful.

– A

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